Creative Work


Veronica Paver, 17

I wake up to another painful day.
I hear yelling and screaming, and I want to fade away.
I crawl out of the place where I feel safe—my bed,
as deceiving voices start to wake in my head.
They chant, “It’s all your fault,” and “You’re such a mistake.”
These thoughts and voices make my heart and soul ache.
As I see my empty reflection in the mirror,
I want nothing more than to disappear.
A salty, warm tear rolls down my cheek;
but I wipe it away. I can’t be weak.

I am the Lord your God.
I am holding your hand,
so don’t be afraid.
I am here to help you.
Isaiah 41:13 (CEV)

I look away from the mirror and plaster on a fake smile
because hiding my hurt has become part of my lifestyle.
I can’t show people my pain.
They can’t notice the chain
that binds me down.
They can’t know that I feel like I’m being drowned.
My wounds are made invisible by the mask
I put on every day so people won’t ask
questions. But God can see my hurt
through the mask I’ve made.
God knows everything. God loves me and tells me,
“Don’t be afraid.”


PRAYER: God, see through my mask and heal my pain. Amen.


—from devozine (July/August 2015). Copyright © 2015 by The Upper Room®. All rights reserved.

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