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Spiritual Practice

Bible Jokes and Mix-ups

Moses 3 TS 114365892

  • When confronted by the giant Goliath, David said, “Wait until I get a little boulder.” (Read 1 Samuel 17:48–51)
  • Moses has the distinction of being the only person to break all ten Commandments at one time. (Read Exodus 32:1–4, 15–19.)
  • You think music is loud today. When Joshua and his band blew their trumpets, the walls of Jericho came tumbling down. (Read Joshua 6:15–16, 20.)
  • Noah’s wife was Joan of Ark. Noah built an ark, and the animals came on in pears. (Read Genesis 6:11–22.)
  • The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple. (Read Genesis 3:1–7.)
  • The greatest miracle in the Bible was when Joshua told his son to stand still, and his son obeyed him. (Read Joshua 10:12–14.)
  • Solomon, one of David’s sons, had seven hundred wives and three hundred porcupines. (Read 1 Kings 11:1–4.)
  • When three wise guys from the east side arrived, they found Jesus in the manager. (Read Luke 2:1–7 and Matthew 2:1–12.)
  • When Joseph of Arimathea was asked, “Why did you allow Jesus to be buried in your new tomb?” he replied, “It was only for the weekend!” (Read Matthew 27:57–60.)

 

From infancy you have known the holy Scriptures.
2 Timothy 3:15a (NIV)

MIX IT UP: What Bible stories do you know well enough to intentionally mix up a word or phrase in order to produce a smile? Try them out on a friend.

—from devozine (January/February 2006). Copyright © 2005 by The Upper Room®. All rights reserved.

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